Tag Archives: craigslist

Enough with the sex scandals already

Actor Christopher Lee poses on the red carpet ...

Reuters photo

Christopher Lee shirtless! No, not that one. This one:

Christopher Lee

Associated Press image (from the U.S. House of Representatives)

Don’t get me wrong; I’m happy to see any Repugnican politician bite the dust, but something feels at least somewhat wrong about the latest casualty of a sex scandal, Repugnican U.S. Rep. Christopher Lee of New York.

Lee resigned his seat in the U.S. House of Representatives today after the website Gawker revealed that he had responded to a 34-year-old woman’s personals ad on Craigslist, telling her that he is a divorced, 39-year-old lobbyist, when, in fact, he’s a 46-year-old married-with-child U.S. representative.

And, Gawker reports, he sent her these images:

Married GOP Congressman Sent Sexy Pictures to Craigslist Babe

Oops.

The woman contacted Gawker about her e-correspondence with Lee, and the rest is history.

I don’t really see, though, that Lee was guilty of much more than attempted infidelity and apparently being in the throes of a midlife crisis. I mean, lying about his age, repeatedly using “Lol” in his e-mails to his would-be mistress, posing shirtless in a mirror and flexing his biceps like a teenager — that reeks of a midlife crisis to me.

As reprehensible as he seems to be — Gawker notes that Lee’s “support for ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’ and vote to reject federal abortion funding suggests a certain comfort with publicly scrutinizing others’ sex lives” while his own apparently is quite interesting* — it seems to me that the matter really is between Lee and his wife. And, dare I say, that he shouldn’t have had to resign over it.

As fun as it is to dog-pile upon an apparent Repugnican hypocrite (wait, that’s redundant…), my concern is that these sex scandals, aside from giving us perverse entertainment at the expense of others’ privacy, serve to preserve our national hangups over sexuality.

Lee’s crime here isn’t that he’s a sexual being. We all are sexual beings, and sex, when used for communion, is a wonderful thing. Lee’s crime here is that he’s a liar. He apparently lies to his wife (unless they have an open relationship, which I rather doubt) and he very apparently lied to his would-be mistress. (No, it’s not OK to lie about your stats and status, even for just a Craigslist hookup.) This makes you wonder how much Lee lies in other areas of his life.

But the embarrassment of having his private e-mails and his shirtless pic released to the entire world should be punishment enough for Lee.

Again, this was an attempted extramarital dalliance, not sexual harassment while on the job or sexual assault, which of course would justify resignation from elected office.

By focusing on the salaciously scandalous aspects of Rep. Christopher Lee’s downfall, we are missing the opportunity to have national discussions about the more important human issues, such as how we can age gracefully (and not pathetically), what we can do to change our youth-obsessed culture, and whether or not monogamy really works in the first place.

Until we do have those discussions, the sex scandals will continue.

*Gawker does not get itself off of the hook for being sensationalistic by pointing to Lee’s apparent hypocrisy. I’m perfectly OK with outing — exposing a closeted (usually Repugnican) politician whose voting record has been anti-homosexual — but this is not the same thing.

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Is it time to reel in craigslist?

  

Memo to the down-low craigslist skanks: It’s “D-I-S-C-R-E-E-T.” And please, please, please come out of the fucking closet already, because it’s fundamentally fucked up that the rest of us fags who are men enough to be out of the fucking closet have to fight for your equal human and civil rights, too. You closet cases want your cock and eat it too, but I say: Fuck. That. Shit. Thank you!

There are calls now to put restraints on craigslist, especially its “erotic services” category, in the aftermath of the arrest of a 23-year-old male medical student in Boston for the murder of a 25-year-old female masseuse he met through the online classified ad service.

But the larger threat to the public good than the “erotic services” ads on craigslist, even those “erotic services” ads that are just a cover for prostitution, it seems to me, are the free hookup ads on craigslist, which are a public health and safety nightmare.

Oh, sure, craigslist has its disclaimers and warnings (like the alcohol pushers who advise you to “drink responsibly”), and yes, it’s rather entertaining and often titillating to peruse the hookups ads to see what people actually will post, but should people really be enabled to have recreational sex to the degree that craigslist enables them to?

True, skanks probably are going to be skanks, and if it’s not craigslist it probably will be a park or truck-stop bathroom or the like, but I think that one could make a public-health and public-safety argument for at least some restrictions on craigslist.

At the same time, I’m a firm believer in First Amendment rights and the right to associate with whomever one wishes to associate, so I don’t know how curbing the damage that craigslist is facilitating* can be squared with constitutional rights.

Constitutional rights, however, take a back seat when there is public harm, and craigslist, despite its owners’ and operators’ self-preservation-minded claims to the contrary, is facilitating a lot of public harm. 

Should craigslist be allowed to continue to profit (yes, craigslist is for-profit) at the expense of the public good?

* I refer to the transmission of sexually transmitted diseases; the enabling of sexually compulsive behavior; the emotional harm that is caused as the result of infidelity; the enabling of “bicurious” men (or men who even claim, surreally, to be completely straight even though they are seeking out sex with other men) to stay in the closet; facilitating violent crimes like robbery, assualt and battery, kidnapping and even murder; etc.

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m4m craigslist poetry

To amuse myself sometimes I jump on to craigslist and see what my fellow faggots have actually posted.

Gay (“m4m”) “missed connections” on craigslist are often pathetic and sad. Often it seems that a lonely gay man will mistake another man’s friendliness for possible sexual/romantic interest and then desperately seek him via craigslist. Sometimes you wonder if two men who might have been the kind of couple they make romantic movies about missed each other like two ships passing each other in the night (or something like that). 

I came across this on the gay “missed connections.” It’s sheer poetry, and this is a direct copy and paste:

          why are you with him?

          you came into my store with your boyfriend.
          your snakebites are adorable.

          your boyfriend is ugly.
          very ugly.
          leave him and get with me.
          i can get you a discount.

I don’t know why, exactly, but I love that. (Oh — “snakebites,” I understand from Googling, are facial piercings, usually of the lower lip.)

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