Monthly Archives: February 2010

Elton says that Jesus was a poof

Thank Goddess that Elton John has created a tempest in a teacup by proclaiming that Jesus Christ was gay.

Otherwise, I might have to write about the annual Conservative Action Political Conference, which began yesterday and concludes tomorrow.

What the fuck do the conservatives have to say that is new, since by fucking definition they represent the old, cold, dead hand of the past? They still have us stuck in the 1950s, accusing their opponents of being Commies when Communism pretty much died in the early 1990s, for fuck’s sake.

It’s much more interesting to write about Elton’s assertion that Jesus was a fag.

Reports AFP:

British pop superstar Elton John stirred controversy in a magazine interview [today] when he claimed that Jesus Christ was “gay.”

“I think Jesus was a compassionate, super-intelligent gay man who understood human problems,” John said in an interview posted on the website of U.S. celebrity news magazine Parade.

“On the cross, he forgave the people who crucified him. Jesus wanted us to be loving and forgiving. I don’t know what makes people so cruel. Try being a gay woman in the Middle East — you’re as good as dead,” said John, who is gay.

The Catholic League, the largest U.S. Catholic rights group, condemned the comments.

“Jesus was certainly compassionate, but to say he was ‘super-intelligent’ is to compare the son of God to a successful game-show contestant,” league president Bill Donohue said in a statement.

“More seriously, to call Jesus a homosexual is to label him a sexual deviant. But what else would we expect from a man who previously said, ‘From my point of view, I would ban religion completely’?”

The self-anointed “Christians” really need to get over their hangups over sex. To hate sex is to hate the human race, since the human race is impossible without sex.

However, making the masses feel guilty about sexual urges — which are as innate to human beings as are such other biological impulses as hunger and thirst and sleepiness — sure the fuck is a great way to (try to) control the masses, which is all that the fucking Catholick church and the other “Christo”fascist institutions, such as the Mormon cult and the plethora of right-wing Protestant sects, want to do.

“To call Jesus a homosexual is to label him a sexual deviant,” the Catholick League’s president asserted.

Because the anti-sex Catholick and other “Christian” cults have portrayed Jesus Christ as having been entirely asexual — to the insane degree that they assert that he was not even the product of sex, but was “immaculately” conceived — of course the assertion that he was gay, or even might have been gay, is modern-day heresy.

But to those of us who live in the world of reality, we have to assume that the historical Jesus, if he did exist (I tend to believe that he did), was a human being, and that as a human being, he most likely was not asexual.

To the question as to whether or not Jesus was gay (or bisexual, if bisexuality in men truly exists), if we are sane, rational and honest, we can only answer: Who knows?

Jesus certainly might have been. He lived more than two millenia ago and we just don’t know anything about his actual sexual practices (or unlikely lack thereof). I find it highly unlikely that he never had at least one orgasm in his entire life.

What the “Christians” say about Jesus’ life certainly doesn’t point to heterosexuality: He never married and he surrounded himself with 12 other dudes… Let’s face it: the “Christian” account of Jesus’ life does not exactly paint him as a pussy hound. (Even the Buddha is said to have married and fathered a child before he went off and became enlightened.)

Jesus’ reputed verbal skills, compassion, sensitivity and wisdom (including his being a huge proponent of forgiveness and of cooperation over competition) — and his penchant toward teaching and healing — all point to the feminine, which, when strong in males, usually indicates homosexuality. Although people like Joe the Plumber have come to represent “Christians,” Jesus Christ is not portrayed as anything like Joe the Plumber, either in the New Testament or even in the twisted versions of the New Testament that the “Christians” love to propagate.

Indeed, it was ignorant, fearful people like Joe the Plumber who crucified Jesus, so yeah, it’s plausible that Jesus Christ indeed was queer.

While Jesus’ sexual orientation is debatable, what is not debatable is that he was a socialist, advocating that we take care of everyone and proclaiming that it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than it is for a rich person to enter the kingdom of heaven. He was a pacifist, too. He said to pay your taxes, not to charge interest on loans (indeed, he even taught not to even expect your loan to be repaid!), and not to hoard worldly wealth, but to lay your treasures up in heaven (that is, to work on your spirituality instead of your materiality). And he certainly would have opposed the death penalty, having been a victim of it himself.

Yet today’s “Christians” worship the golden calf and are bitterly opposed to helping the poor (unless they “convert” them first, of course; their “help” almost never comes without strings attached), hate paying their fair share of taxes,* love war and bloodshed — especially in Jesus’ name — and cherish the death penalty. 

If Jesus ever does come back in his promised second coming, he’d better be careful, because his “followers” will crucify him.

*On the issue of taxes, let me say that the middle class — what is left of the middle class — is way overtaxed and that the plutocrats and the corporatocrats are way under-taxed. They benefit from what tax revenues give them, but they do everything in their power to avoid paying their fair share of taxes, while the little guy, like Joe the Kamikaze, have to keep the nation fiscally afloat. (Well, not that we are fiscally afloat now, but you know what I mean…)  

Advertisements

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Was capitalism turning Joe the Kamikaze into a ‘socialist’?

This undated photo provided by Pam Parker on Thursday, Feb. ...

Smoke billows from a seven-story building after a small private ...

Associated Press photos

Joseph Stack, a frustrated middle-aged American who was as mad as hell and couldn’t take it anymore, made a Kamikaze attack on a building housing the Internal Revenue Service in Austin, Texas, today, killing himself and a person inside of the building. In his long suicide note he stated that he hoped that “the American zombies wake up and revolt.”

The suicide note of Joseph Stack, the 53-year-old who 9/11’d (can we use “9/11”  as a verb now? Please?) the Internal Revenue Service building in Austin, Texas, today, is long and rambling — and there is much of it that I agree with.

As much as we moonbats might like Stack to have been a tea-bagger – so that we could point out how dangerously extremist the tea-baggers can be (one “tea party” ringleader recently thought that it was funny to “joke” about hanging a Democratic U.S. senator for Washington state, for instance) — from his suicide screed, Stack seems to have been fairly in the middle of the road in terms of his political ideology.

Probably the most interesting part of his suicide note comes at the very end of it. He concluded his note as follows:

The communist creed: From each according to his ability, to each according to his need.

The capitalist creed: From each according to his gullibility, to each according to his greed.

Joe Stack (1956-2010)

Earlier in his suicide note, Stack observed that “We are further brainwashed to believe that there is freedom in this place,” and I have to agree with him that we Americans have only the illusion of freedom; the powers that be control us quite effectively. (Stop doing what the powers that be expect you to do, and you soon will see how much “freedom” you actually have.)

Stack also wrote, as though he were a left-wing blogger:

Why is it that a handful of thugs and plunderers can commit unthinkable atrocities (and in the case of the GM executives, for scores of years) and when it’s time for their gravy train to crash under the weight of their gluttony and overwhelming stupidity, the force of the full federal government has no difficulty coming to their aid within days if not hours?

Yet at the same time, the joke we call the American medical system, including the drug and insurance companies, are murdering tens of thousands of people a year and stealing from the corpses and victims they cripple, and this country’s leaders don’t see this as important as bailing out a few of their vile, rich cronies.

Yet, the political “representatives” (thieves, liars, and self-serving scumbags is far more accurate) have endless time to sit around for year after year and debate the state of the “terrible health care problem.” It’s clear they see no crisis as long as the dead people don’t get in the way of their corporate profits rolling in.

Now, the corporations have brainwashed the tea-baggin’ mouth-breathers to defend the wealth — er, health care system, not to bash it, so yeah, I don’t think that Stack drank the tea.

And you certainly won’t hear the tea-baggers bashing capitalism (and/or making any sort of a statement that possibly could be construed as an acceptance of communism or socialism), and you won’t hear them saying that we don’t have freedom here in the United States (unless, of course, they are asserting that Barack HUSSEIN Obama somehow has taken their freedom from them [you know, their freedom from black presidents], but of course they would assert that their freedom was just peachy fucking keen under the BushCheneyCorp, when, of course, it was not).

Stack sounds like he was a very frustrated, fairly average American.

I don’t advocate 9/11’ing — news reports indicate that Stack’s suicide mission killed at least one person who was inside of the building, and it’s wrong to take anyone else with you if you decide to exit this world (yes, even if he or she worked for the IRS…) – but I suspect that Stack was saner than many if not most of us would care to admit…

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Go out bawling over the brawling

Sen. Evan Bayh, D-Ind., speaks with the reporters after a news ...

Associated Press photo

Democratic U.S. Sen. Evan Bayh of Indiana has filled for the mainstream “news” media the-sky-is-falling-for-the-Democrats vacuum that Repugnican Scott Brown left after his takeover of the solidly Democratic U.S. Senate seat in Massachusetts became old news. Bayh is shown above getting his Warholian minutes when he announced yesterday that he won’t seek a third term in the U.S. Senate.

Evan Bayh is still in the news today.

The mainstream “news” media are so hungry for sensationalism that they’ll create sensationalism where it isn’t. The Scott Brown brouhaha has past, so now they’ve latched on to what even The Christian Science Monitor sensationistically has dubbed the “Bayh bombshell” (from which “Washington is still reeling”).

Oh, yeah, it’s shock and awe!

Some analysts have posited that Bayh became a U.S. senator only because he wanted a better shot at the White House, and that he doesn’t want to have to wait, languishing in a job in the Senate that he never really wanted, until 2016, which is probably the next shot at the White House that he’d get. And what if he didn’t get that?

What’s so “stunning” (another sensationalistic term that The Christian Science Monitor used to describe Bayh’s depature from the Senate, as did The Associated Press) about a politician’s apparent lust for personal political power, which he apparently cloaks as his alleged concern for the people? (If Bayh is so fucking concerned about what’s best for the people instead of his own political future, then why in the fuck did he vote, like a lemming, for the Vietraq War, when many senators, including my own Sen. Barbara Boxer, had the sense to vote against it?)

So Bayh goes out bawling, bitching and moaning about how he doesn’t like the bickering in the Senate.

What, I wonder, is Bayh like at a sports event? Is he dismayed that the two teams are — gasp!competing with each other instead of cooperating with each other?

Don’t they say that politics is a contact sport?

Bayh is a liar — blaming the “partisanship” (like that’s a bad thing) of the Senate for his departure from it when really, just like Sarah Palin-Quayle just didn’t have any more personal use for the governorship of Alaska, he has no more personal use for the Senate — and/or he’s a pussy who doesn’t have the stomach for polarized debate, which, the last time I checked, has existed in Congress since its inception. Really — did he read the job description before he took the job?

And shame on The Christian Science Monitor for also jumping on the the-Democrats-are-losers-for-not-being-able-to-hold-on-to-60-filibuster-proof-Senate-seats bandwagon.

The Monitor goes on and on about how after the November 2010 elections the Democratic Party probably still will retain a majority of the Senate seats, but almost certainly won’t retain its current 59-seat majority.

But the Monitor doesn’t bother to mention that during George W. Bush’s eight years of unelected rule, the Repugnican Party never had more than 55 of the Senate seats in its hands at any one time.

Suddenly, if you don’t have filibuster-proof majority, which is hard to get and even harder to keep, you’re worthless, but the Repugnicans during the reign of the BushCheneyCorp were always at least five seats away.

Not to sound too much like the fuckarded Sarah Palin-Quayle and her ilk, but what is with the mainstream “news” media’s double fucking standard? Why the much higher standards for the Democratic Party?

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Bayh humbug!

Indiana Senator Evan Bayh, a leading Democrat seen here in 2007, ...

AFP photo

Meh. Let the door hit him on his ass on his way out. He’s too John Edwards-y anyway.

So another DINO (a.k.a. “centrist”) U.S. senator bites the dust.

As usual, the mainstream “news” media are playing this up for maximum sensationalism. Reports The Associated Press:

Washington – The stunning announcement by centrist Indiana Democratic Sen. Evan Bayh that he’s retiring from a Congress he no longer loves adds yet another name to a list of lawmakers fleeing a town they say has become acidly partisan. And it gives Republicans a chance to pick up a seat.

The decision by the Indiana Democrat, who was in strong position to win a third term in November in his GOP-leaning state, also compounds the problems facing Senate Democrats this fall as they cling to their majority in the chamber, where they now hold 59 of the 100 votes.

Bayh joins a growing roster of recent Democratic retirements that includes Rep. Patrick Kennedy of Rhode Island and Sens. Christopher Dodd of Connecticut and Byron Dorgan of North Dakota. Yet the congressional casualty list has a decidedly bipartisan flavor, with recent retirement announcements coming from Rep. Lincoln Diaz-Balart, R-Fla., and other GOP House members from Michigan, Indiana, Arkansas and Arizona….

The departure of Bayh, 54, sent deeper shock waves than most. Telegenic and on the list of potential running mates for the past two Democratic national tickets, Bayh is known more for the moderate tone of his politics than for any particular legislative achievements, and his parting words had a notably plaintive tenor.

“To put it in words most Hoosiers can understand: I love working for the people of Indiana, I love helping our citizens make the most of their lives, but I do not love Congress,” Bayh said [today]  in the statement he read in Indianapolis announcing his decision.

He also lambasted the acid divide between Democrats and Republicans in Washington, saying, “I am not motivated by strident partisanship or ideology.” …

Well, yeah, if you find it to be too hot in the kitchen, then you probably should just get the fuck out.

Bayh couldn’t pick a side — good (progressivism — a.k.a. “socialism”) or evil (conservatism/social Darwinism) — and so he found things too unpleasant.

Boo.

Fucking.

Hoo.

The Repugnicans gloat over every Democratic departure, but what a great fucking gig it is to be a Repugnican, if you can get it: Your party ran the nation into the ground from January 2001 to January 2009, but now you can blame things on the opposition party — and you can get away with it because too many of the fucktarded “citizens” of the United States of Amnesia don’t remember even recent American history.

(I am reading Al Gore’s The Assault on Reason concurrently with Susan Jacoby’s The Age of American Unreason. These aren’t good books if you want to feel falsely good about your fellow Americans. For that you would need to read something written by a wingnut, such as A Patriot’s History of the United States. [Hey, at least I’m not also reading Idiot America: How Stupidity Became a Virtue in the Land of the Free… (It is on my amazon.com wish list, however…)])

Let’s back up to the first paragraph of that AP news story, though:

Washington – The stunning announcement by centrist Indiana Democratic Sen. Evan Bayh that he’s retiring from a Congress he no longer loves adds yet another name to a list of lawmakers fleeing a town they say has become acidly partisan. And it gives Republicans a chance to pick up a seat.

“Stunning.” The writer is telling you how to feel about the news item: stunned. The writer can’t just give you the facts and let you decide; the writer has to appeal to your emotions right off. (Are you feeling stunned right about now?)

“Acidly partisan.” “Acidly”?

Partisan, sure — gee, go figure, that when you have two opposing parties you have some (gasp!) partisanship — but “acidly”? What, if everyone doesn’t get along and hold hands and sing “Kumbaya,” that’s a horrible thing?

Really, though — if everyone were on the same page, would that really be a good place to be? Because which side is going to sacrifice its core principles in order to achieve this uber-fucking-“Kumbaya”-fest? I’m never going to embrace white supremacism, plutocracy, election theft, bogus wars and social Darwinism, to name just a handful of the evil things that the Repugnican Party stands for (in no certain order), so I’m fucking thrilled that there is some fucking partisanship in D.C.

But the best part of that lead paragraph is that immediately after the “news” writer uses the phrase “acidly partisan,” he adds: “And it gives Republicans a chance to pick up a seat,” apparently stoking the fires of the very same partisanship that he has just indicated is a bad thing.

Shit, maybe if you are confused you shouldn’t blame yourself, as our “professional” “news” “reporters” seem to be just as confused as you are.

And why do the mainstream “news” media constantly assert that having 59 of the 100 U.S. Senate seats is sooo inadequate? Is it because when your party is headed by a black president, you have to do much better than your white guy would? The Repugnicans never held more than 55 of the Senate seats during George W. Bush’s disastrous time in the White House. I don’t recall that the Repugnican Party ever was faulted for having “only” 55 Senate seats, yet the Democrats essentially are called losers for having “only” 59 Senate seats right now.

Fifty-nine percent is a fairly strong majority. Since when is it such a horrible thing to have a 59-percent majority? Even if the Democrats had only 55 Senate seats, the Repugnicans could have no more than 45. That’s still a 10-seat advantage. Fuck.

Get rid of the fucking undemocratic filifuckingbuster, and it would be fine to have even just a 51-seat majority.

But let me get back to Bayh. Oooooo, he’s “telegenic”! Big whoop. I can — and I do — look at a copious amount of images of nice-looking males on the Internet every fucking day. “Telegenic” males are a dime a dozen. Hell, they don’t even cost a dime. You can download them for free. (I know…)

This is probably the most useful portion of the AP “news” story above: “Bayh is known more for the moderate tone of his politics than for any particular legislative achievements.”

In other words, he’s pretty, but legislatively, he’s worthless. And he doesn’t know good from evil, so we call him a “centrist” or a “moderate” or even — ughhh — “bipartisan.”

Um, yeah.

Buh-bye, Bayh.

Buh-bye.

Once all of the “centrists” are out of Congress, then maybe good finally can prevail over evil once and for all.

1 Comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Assorted shit

Why the dick won’t shut the fuck up

In this photo released by ABC former Vice President Dick Cheney ...

Associated Press photo

Gas bag Dick Cheney appears on a political talk show aired this morning in order to (what else?) bash the Obama administration. The Associated Press correctly although too diplomatically deems Cheney’s “public criticism on a successor administration” as “unusual.”

Gay conservative commentator Andrew Sullivan and I agree on one thing (besides our attraction to members of our own sex): Former Vice President Dick Cheney is still talking, more than a year after he left office, because he’s afraid that he might, just might, actually be prosecuted for his war crimes one day.

Politico quotes Sullivan as having stated in an e-mail:

“Cheney’s unprecedentedly aggressive approach … reflects his own knowledge that he has committed war crimes of a very grave sort, war crimes that at some point could lead to prosecution and will undoubtedly lead to historical infamy.”

“If that becomes the prevailing narrative — because it is true — he will go down in history as a man who betrayed the very core principles of Western civilization out of panic and then covered it up,” Sullivan continued. “So he has to change the subject and launch this kind of PR campaign to throw everyone off the scent….

“Cheney is cornered. He knows justice is coming, and he knows that one day the full truth will come out and there will be no hiding. Until then, he will fight and fight and break every taboo that respect for the Constitution and for civil discourse requires.”

Sullivan has been one of the leading voices criticizing the news media — and Politico specifically — for giving Cheney a platform for his rhetorical blasts in interviews without challenging his premises and also forcing him to answer for his own alleged misdeeds in office….

Cheney isn’t fooling anyone, though, isn’t throwing anyone off of his stench. And by keeping himself in the limelight, he is drawing more attention to himself and to his treasonous war crimes. Stupid.

I mean, George W. Bush, a dumbfuck extraordinaire, is smart enough to keep a low profile, and why is Dick Fucking Cheney criticizing the Obama administration when Al Gore, President Bill Clinton’s veep, didn’t routinely criticize the BushCheneyCorp administration, even though there was plenty to criticize?

(I can recall that Gore only made one fiery speech critical of the unelected Bush regime, in the wake of the breaking of the Abu Ghraib House of Horrors scandal to the entire world community. That speech was quite appropriate, given that it had turned out that Americans had treated Iraqi prisoners, most of them innocent of any crime, in a Nazi-like fashion. I don’t believe that during the eight long nightmarish years between January 2001 and January 2009 Gore made more than one or two prominent speeches in which his main topic was criticism of the BushCheneyCorp, yet here is Cheney, who can’t keep himself off of the Sunday morning political shows.)

Anyway, it isn’t like it was Sullivan who made me see the light of the truth. It was in a post titled “Die, Dick, Die!” in October that I wrote:

Cheney, with his latest act his rant against the Obama administration’s handling of Afghanistan (where he would have proclaimed “mission accomplished” already), is trying to salvage his “legacy” by acting as though he really cares about national security instead of war profiteering (he did deliver his war-profiteering corporation Halliburton the Vietraq War, after all), the pundits are chattering, but my best guess is that Cheney is terrified that he might actually be charged as the war criminal that he is and that he therefore is trying to drum up public opinion to be sympathetic toward his sorry, felonious, treasonous ass should justice actually ever be done and he actually be held accountable for the thousands upon thousands of unnecessary deaths of our men and women in uniform and of innocent Iraqi civilians (and many, many other innocent civilians throughout the Middle East).

I also have to wonder if perhaps Tricky Dick still believes that he is in power; maybe that faulty, Grinch-like, two-sizes-too-small heart of his isn’t supplying his brain with enough oxygen. Politico quotes Cheney as having said, when asked how George W. Bush feels about his outspokenness, “I’m the vice president now — ex-vice president. I have the great freedom and luxury of speaking out, saying what I want to say, what I believe. And I have not been discouraged from doing so.” 

“I’m the vice president now”? Sounds like a Freudian slip to me.

Fuck the filibuster!

Rachel Maddow has called — I think — for doing away with the filibuster.* While she focuses on how boring (but how important) the concept of the filibuster is, and calls for renaming the filibuster, what she seems to be aiming at is doing away with the filibuster altogether.

Maddow notes that the filibuster used to require two-thirds, or 67 votes, of the U.S. Senate, to be overcome. The filibuster threshold now stands at 60 votes.

While I believe that a simple majority is good enough in a democracy — we don’t require a presidential candidate to get 60 percent of the vote — I could compromise and put the filibuster at 55 votes. That is one-half of the Senate plus one-tenth of one-half of the Senate. That seems fair enough to me.

(And indeed, the infamous progressive Democratic U.S. Rep. Alan Grayson of Florida has called for a 55-vote filibuster threshold, and you can sign his petition for this more reasonable filibuster threshold at StopSenateStalling.com.)

As Maddow and Grayson note, the filibuster is not contained anywhere in the U.S. Constitution, but is only a Senate rule. Wikipedia notes that Senate rules can be changed by a simple majority vote of the Senate — and that this is what the Repugnicans, during the reign of the unelected Bush regime, threatened to do with their “nuclear option,” to do away with the filibuster, an option that the Democrats thus far have been too pussy to take.

I say: Nuke the motherfuckers. Now. 

The 60-vote filibuster is preventing any progress from being made and has hamstrung the U.S. government.

The 60-vote filibuster reminds me of how the two-thirds vote requirement for the California Legislature to pass the state’s budget has only hamstrung rather than helped my home state’s budget process.

Unfortunately, that ridiculous requirement for a super-majority is contained in the state’s Constitution, and the easiest way to change that would be to amend the state’s Constitution at the ballot box. Many if not most proponents of changing the state’s two-thirds-vote budget-bill requirement are OK with making it a 55-percent-vote requirement instead. I’m OK with that.

Dick Cheney and I actually agree on something!

An Associated Press article on how long it might take the U.S. military to finally stop discriminating against non-heterosexuals reports:

The goal, according to senior defense and military officials, is to avoid the backlash that could result from imposing change too fast. While officials expect resistance from only a minority of service members and believe that it could be contained with discipline, officials fear isolated incidents of violence could erupt as a means of protest.

What does it say of the quality of the individuals in our military that “violence could erupt as a means of protest” against granting equal human and civil rights to everyone in the military?

Actually, though, I don’t think that really is the stupid white men’s concern. I suspect that once again, the stupid old white men are just using our troops as political human shields for themselves. (The members of the unelected Bush regime did that routinely when they tried to morph any valid criticisms of their launching and their handling of their Vietraq War into attacks on our troops.)

It’s the stupid old white men who are far more afraid of the change than are the young people in the military.

Even Dick Cheney, whose daughter is a dyke, has my back on this one. Reports the AP:

According to a Washington Post-ABC News poll, three-quarters of Americans say that they support openly gay people serving in the military. The 75 percent figure is far above the 44 percent of Americans who said so in May 1993.

Former Vice President Dick Cheney, defense secretary in the first Bush administration, said [today] he supports a review of the [“don’t ask, don’t tell”] policy.

“When the chiefs come forward and say we think we can do it, it strikes me it’s time to reconsider the policy,” he said. “I’m reluctant to second-guess the military in this regard.”

Cheney, who has an openly gay daughter, said he thinks society has moved on from staunch opposition to gays serving in the military.

“It’s partly a generational question,” he told ABC’s “This Week,” adding that “things have changed significantly” since the [“DADT”] policy took effect.

“Partly” a generational question? No, it’s almost wholly a generational question.

OK, so I guess that I still have plenty of disagreement with the dick…

Move over, Margaret!

Speaking of dykes, Wanda Sykes is my new favorite comedian.

I recently bought the DVD of her HBO stand-up special “I’ma Be Me,” which was recorded in Washington, D.C., in August, and my boyfriend and I have watched it twice.

Wanda rocks.

Margaret Cho, a self-proclaimed fag hag, has been the default gay guy’s comedian for some years now, and I still love ya, Margaret, but Wanda is funnier and fresher than you are.

Wanda’s political sensibilities seem to be much sharper than those of Margaret, who, if her autobiographical claims about herself are accurate, apparently spent a lot of years partying before she woke up to the political scene circa 2003 or 2004.

And while Margaret’s material is stale, Wanda’s is new to me.

Wanda comes to her comedy from the perspective of being a black lesbian. (She came out in November 2008, after the odious Prop H8 passed here in California.)

In her HBO stand-up special Wanda doesn’t talk too much about lesbianism — her comedy is much less sexually graphic and less scatological than is Margaret’s — but her take on what it’s like to be black in white America is hilarious and even eye-opening.

“White people are looking at you!” she intones throughout her routine, and while it’s comedy, it rings true. Her bit about finally being able to buy a whole watermelon at the supermarket — now that Barack Obama is president — is hilarious and probably only she could get away with something like that.

Wanda’s riff on pirates (yes, pirates — a reference to when the Somali pirates were in the news) also is ROLF-level good, and the way that she brings back certain themes throughout her routine is masterfully funny.  

Wanda’s 15-minute performance at the 2009 White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner probably gave her the most national exposure that she’s ever had, but, as she says right off in “I’ma Be Me,” she had to hold back at the correspondents’ dinner.

She’s much better when she’s off-leash, so to speak, as she is in “I’ma Be Me.”

The only criticism that I have of “I’ma Be Me” is that Wanda uses at least two or three of the jokes that she already used at the correspondents’ dinner. She’s allowed to rehash her own material, of course, but you would think that she would have realized that many if not most of us had already heard those jokes.

Wanda’s facial expressions and her willingness to move around on stage liberally add entertainment value to her already-funny material, and she’s so adorable that even when she chuckles at her own jokes it’s quite forgivable.

You owe it to yourself to watch “I’ma Be Me,” whether it’s still showing periodically on HBO or whether you buy the DVD (such as via amazon.com).

Out to pasture for the McCainosaurus?

There is talk that Repugnican John McCainosaurus might lose the Repugnican primary to his even wingnuttier challenger, J.D. Hayworth, ending McCainosaurus’ stint in the U.S. Senate, which began in 1987.

Reports The Associated Press:

Phoenix – Defeated just two years ago as the Republican presidential candidate and with his bonafides as a true conservative again being challenged, John McCain finds himself in a struggle to get even his party’s nomination for another term in the Senate.

Many conservatives and “tea party” activists are lining up behind Republican challenger and former [right-wing] talk radio host J.D. Hayworth, reflecting a rising tide of voter frustration with incumbent politicians. Only 40 percent of Arizonans have a favorable view of McCain’s job performance.

Faced with his toughest re-election battle ever, McCain has moved to the right on several hot-button issues, like gays in the military and climate change, and has built a campaign war chest of more than $5 million. Former running mate Sarah Palin and newly elected Republican Sen. Scott Brown, both popular with conservatives, are pitching in.

Hayworth, who will officially launch his campaign [tomorrow], began using his talk show on conservative radio station KFYI to drum up opposition to McCain.

“You have a consistent conservative challenger and an incumbent who calls himself a maverick but in fact is a moderate,” Hayworth said, outlining what he views as the central choice for conservative GOP primary voters in August.

McCain is launching his own statewide tour, complete with visits next month from Palin and Brown, who already has recorded calls asking Republicans to support McCain.

The four-term senator and his allies also are taking aim at Hayworth. In December, they filed a complaint with the Federal Election Commission arguing that the talk show host was a de facto candidate and his radio station was providing a corporate gift by allowing him to campaign on the air. And they’re attacking Hayworth’s 12-year record as a [U.S. representative] representing the eastern suburbs of Phoenix….

Democrat Harry Mitchell defeated Hayworth four years ago, winning the GOP-dominated [U.S. House] district amid a rough national climate for Republicans and questions about Hayworth’s dealings with disgraced lobbyist Jack Abramoff.

Hayworth ran a conservative campaign emphasizing his opposition to illegal immigration, but he was dogged by a reputation for being an angry and combative partisan, highlighted by an editorial in the state’s largest newspaper recommending “Mitchell over the bully.”

Hayworth said he decided to quit the [right-wing radio talk] show and run for [the U.S. Senate] in late January after holding “town-hall meetings five days a week” with his conservative listeners.

They are angry, Hayworth says, about McCain’s history of teaming with Democrats on key issues. In the past decade McCain has worked with Sen. Russ Feingold of Wisconsin on campaign finance reform and with the late Sen. Ted Kennedy of Massachusetts on an immigration bill that would have created a pathway to citizenship for illegal immigrants….

A poll last month by the Phoenix-based Behavior Research Center found [McCain’s] lowest approval rating since January 1994, when McCain was in the midst of the “Keating Five” scandal in which he and four other U.S. senators were accused of trying to intimidate regulators on behalf of a real-estate developer later convicted of fraud.

McCain’s once-powerful support from independents is particularly lacking; just 38 percent approved of his performance…. Arizona allows independents to vote in primaries. They could make the difference in a state where 30 percent of the electorate doesn’t belong to a political party….

While I suspect that the McCainosaurus will beat Hayworth, who I remember only as a fugly, goofy-looking

(  )

local television sportscaster when I lived in Phoenix more than a decade ago, it would be hilarious if the McCainosaurus were to lose the Repugnican primary to a tea-baggin’, mouth-breathing, Sarah Palin-Quayle-like stupid white guy whose main platform, like that of Repugnican former U.S. Rep. Tom “Bring Back the Literacy Tests!” Tancredo, is to beat up, like the ignorant bully that he is, on powerless, brown-skinned, “illegal” immigrants, who, as Wanda Sykes correctly points out in “I’ma Be Me,” aren’t criminals, but who just want to make a better life for themselves. (I would tell her joke, but I don’t want to spoil it for you; you’ll just have to watch “I’ma Be Me.”)

*Wikipedia’s entry “filibuster” states:

A filibuster, or “speaking or talking out a bill,” is a form of obstruction in a legislature or other decision-making body whereby one attempts to delay or entirely prevent a vote on a proposal by extending a debate on that proposal. A popular saying is “filibuster it to death!”

The term “filibuster” was first used in 1851. It was derived from the Spanish [word] “filibustero,” meaning “pirate” or “freebooter.” … 

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Life imitates art in occupied Palestine

REFILE - CORRECTING VILLAGE  Protesters dressed as characters ...

A Demonstrator dressed as a figure of the movie 'Avatar', shouts ...

In this photo taken Friday, Feb. 12, 2010, demonstrators dressed ...

Palestinians and foreign activists dressed as characters from ...

Reuters and Associated Press photos

Palestinian protesters have likened themselves to the persecuted Na’vi of the blockbuster film “Avatar.” The comparison is apt. 

I love this little news item from The Associated Press yesterday:

Jerusalem – Palestinian protesters have added a colorful twist to demonstrations against Israel’s separation barrier, painting themselves blue and posing as characters from the hit film “Avatar.”

The demonstrators also donned long hair and loincloths Friday for the weekly protest against the barrier near the village of Bilin.

They equated their struggle to the intergalactic one portrayed in the film.

Israel says the barrier is needed for its security. Palestinians consider it a land grab.

The protests have become a symbol of opposition. They often end in clashes with Israeli security forces involving stones and tear gas….

Stones against the mightiest military force in the Middle East, which is made possible by the United States of America — well, by you and me, since it’s our tax dollars that are funneled to Israel.

Israel historically has been the No. 1 recipient of U.S. foreign aid (it is No. 2 right now only because Vietraq surpassed it in 2003), and the extent to which the United States of America is Israel’s little bitch is evident in the logo for the Israel first lobby, the American Israel Public Affairs Committee (AIPAC), whose logo is a morphing of Israel’s Star of David and the United States’ stars and stripes, and who has virtually every politician, Repugnican and Democrat, in its pocket:

Tea Party Princess/Queen Sarah Palin-Quayle, when she delivered her keynote speech to the Wingnut Super Bowl in Nashville, Tenn., recently, wore both a U.S. flag lapel pin and an Israeli flag lapel pin.

That the Israel first lobby’s ass must continue to be dutifully licked, even though the United States of America itself is in the fucking toilet, seems to be the one thing on which the Repugnicans and the Democrats don’t differ at all.

Yet as Glenn Greenwald has pointed out, the wingnuts have slammed Mexican Americans for proudly displaying Mexico’s flag here in the United States, yet the same wingnuts have no problem whatsofuckingever with the display of the Israeli flag here — shit, like Palin-Quayle does, they even wear it — and they apparently have no problem with AIPAC’s morphing of the U.S. flag and the Israeli flag, which even the Mexican Americans do not, to my knowledge, dare to do.

So back to our friends, the real-life Na’vi in Israel-occupied Palestine, the occupation that is made possible by the United States’ continued military support:

Yeah, it’s a pretty fair comparison, the Palestinians to the Na’vi, a people whose land has been taken over by evil, greedy humans with a superior military force and with no conscience whatsofuckingever.

Stand up for the oppressed Palestinians, however, and the Israel first lobby calls you a “Holocaust-denying” “anti-Semite.”

Fuck. That. Shit. I don’t bow to any theocrat, so the Jews who would oppress me for not bowing to them can go fuck themselves as much as can any other religious group that would do so, including the self-proclaimed “Christians” and yes, any Muslims, too.

I certainly don’t deny the Holocaust, which is why I find it incredibly ironic, sad and pathetic that a group of people who once were horribly oppressed themselves would then turn around and, using that historical oppression as a fucking excuse and as fucking cover, horribly oppress another group of people.

It’s not about picking one religion or ethnicity over another — it’s about fairness and it’s about what’s right and what’s wrong, concepts that entirely elude those Israelis and those American Jews who support the continued persecution of the Palestinian people and those non-Jewish Americans who stupidly aid and abet them.

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Palin and the ‘common sense’ threat

Conservative superstar Sarah Palin, seen here in 2009, came ...

AFP photo

Progressives don’t know what to think of Tea Party Princess/Queen Sarah Palin-Quayle.

“Sarah Palin: Still not going to be president,” declares one progressive blogger, noting that Palin-Quayle’s favorability rating is only 37 percent and that more than 70 percent of Americans polled believe, correctly, that she isn’t qualified to be president of the United States of America.

But don’t count Sarah Palin-Quayle out, says another progressive blogger:

Underestimating her ability to manipulate [the masses] harks back to when we assumed that  Al Gore would win the election against George W. Bush.  We were that complacent.  Couldn’t we meander into that stupor once again?

Yes, we could.

If Ted Kennedy’s seat could be lost to a Repugnican due to Democratic complacency, just as complacency allowed the BushCheneyCorp to steal the White House in late 2000, then yes, we could see another “President” George W. Bush.

Easily.

Sarah Palin-Quayle, who has filled the dumbfuck vacuum that George W. Bush left, makes dumb people feel good about being dumb.

Fuck those eggheads! is Palin-Quayle’s rallying cry. (After all, she is the No. 1 defender of the mentally retarded…)

It’s all about “common sense,” Palin-Quayle frequently proclaims.

“Common sense.”

Sounds great, but what “common sense” means is that whatever a significant number of ignorant Americans believe to be true must be true. If a large enough number of Americans believe that Iraq was responsible for 9/11 and possesses weapons of mass destruction — justifying some “shock and awe” and “regime change” and “liberation” — then it must be true! The masses can’t be wrong!

If common sense is really so fucking great, though, then why don’t we allow people with great common sense to become physicians without having to bother to go through medical school? Why can’t those who possess great common sense skip that whole law school crap and just start practicing law? (Judge Judy — isn’t she all about common sense?) Even blue-collar workers, such as auto mechanics and construction workers, have to obtain training and often, if not usually, some sort of license or certification; they can’t coast on common sense alone (although “Joe the Plumber” might be an exception; did he ever get his plumber’s license?).

If your grandma or your neighbor or your postal carrier has great common sense, fine, but don’t we want our political leaders — especially those whose decisions could get us into World War III — to possess more qualifications than “common sense”?

But George W. Bush and Sarah Palin-Quayle and their ilk vicariously fulfill the fantasy of the members of the dumbfuck crowd that they, too, could reach the pinnacle of political power even though they have achieved little to nothing and even though they have no qualifications whatsofuckingever for such a lofty post.

It’s just like winning the lottery — Goddess knows that you didn’t earn it, but suddenly you have all of this money and power! It’s a dream come true!

We progressives misunderestimate (as “President” Bush would have put it) the seductiveness of Sarah Palin-Quayle’s appeal to the lowest common denominator at our own — and at our nation’s — peril.

The best-case scenario would be that Palin-Quayle decides that she would rather reign in hell than serve in heaven and that she therefore launches a third-party or “tea-party” bid for president in 2012, splitting the Repugnican vote — much like how third-party candidate Ross Perot siphoned Repugnican votes from Pappy Bush in 1992, handing the White House to Democrat Bill Clinton with only a plurality of the votes.

But we can’t count on that to happen.

The Repugnicans might, just might, actually rally around Palin-Quayle, if they are that desperate, and if the economy hasn’t improved by then — and the Repugnican minority in Congress is doing its damnedest to ensure that the economy doesn’t improve, in order to damage the Obama administration and the Democratic Party at the ballot box — we could have another very close presidential election, this time between Barack Obama and Sarah Palin-Quayle in 2012. Shit, it might even come down to Florida again.

How do you think the current U.S. Supreme Court would decide that one?

“The fawning of [Palin-Quayle’s] fan base is loud,” notes the aforementioned blogger. “They make more noise than the rest of us.”

Isn’t that exactly what happened in late 2000? That they had lost but that they made more noise than did the rest of us?

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized