Relationship movie

Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet in DreamWorks Pictures' Revolutionary Road

Sinking together again: Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet in a scene from “Revolutionary Road,” the scene in which they first meet and believe that one day they can be the king and the queen of the world. (Instead, they end up mired in 1950s suburbia.)

They talk about date movies, but “Revolutionary Road” is what I’ll call a great relationship movie.

My boyfriend and I, who have been together for more than a year now, are both in our first “real” same-sex relationship, and we are learning all of the lessons that you learn in a relationship, whether you are straight or gay, male or female. These are the lessons that make or break your relationship, depending upon whether you successfully negotiate them or not.

There have been a few times in the course of the past 15 months that I thought that our relationship was facing its imminent demise; this past week I really thought that it was the end, but we pulled through. So we saw “Revolutionary Road” last night in what was great timing; we saw the film when we really needed to see it.

“Revolutionary Road” can be taken as a cautionary tale about letting a relationship go on automatic pilot, about failing in a relationship to communicate constantly — you easily can under-communicate, but arguably you never can over-communicate — and about allowing resentments to build until there is the inevitable volcanic explosion.

“Revolutionary Road” also examines the pressures of what happens in a relationship when one of the partners wants to go in one direction and the other wants to go in another. And the film tackles the problem of whether wishing to get away from it all is a brave, bold move or whether it’s a cowardly move to run away from it all, and whether being happy with what you have is the wisdom of being happy with you have or is resignation, defeat.

With its witty, insightful dialogue and great drama — and plenty of (usually darkly) hilarious moments — no review could do “Revolutionary Road” justice, so I won’t try too hard to do so.

“Revolutionary Road” arguably is too dark — one could argue, I suppose, that even stifled life in the conservative 1950s wasn’t that bad (I don’t know because I wasn’t there) — but it seems to me that if “Road” weren’t as dark as it is, the lessons that it has to teach wouldn’t sink in as deeply, and “Road” is directed by Sam Mendes, who brought us the dark “American Beauty.” Would we expect less of a film by Mendes?

Speaking of “American Beauty,” “Revolutionary Road” feels like a mixture of some movies that we’ve seen before, including “American Beauty,” of course, but also “Far from Heaven,” with its very un-“Leave-It-to-Beaver”-like portrayal of the 1950s, and even “Brokeback Mountain,” because both “Revolutionary Road” and “Brokeback Mountain” co-star David Harbour, who in “Brokeback” played Randall, the working stiff with the annoying, rather clueless wife who presumably has a homosexual extramarital affair with Jake Gyllenhaal’s character of Jack, and who in “Road” plays Shep, a working stiff with the rather annoying, clueless wife who has a heterosexual extramarital affair with his neighbor April Wheeler, the character played by Kate Winslet.

Speaking of Winslet, it’s great to see Winslet and Leonard DiCaprio back together again, this time as married couple April and Frank Wheeler in the dystopian 1950s, and I noted while watching it that “Revolutionary Road” has at least one sly reference to “Titanic” (which was a great date movie…). I would tell you what it is, but I won’t; if you see the film and figure it out, feel free to leave the answer in the comments portion of this post.

For the great performances of Winslet and DiCaprio, it’s co-star Michael Shannon, as psychiatric patient on furlough John Givings, who steals the show, however; I expect him to at least be nominated for Best Supporting Actor (if he hasn’t already been; are the Oscar nominations out yet? I should know that…).

It’s true that the point that it’s the “crazy” man who actually is the sanest character in the film is fairly beaten into the ground, but the dialogue among the John Givings character, the Frank and April Wheeler characters and the characters of John Givings’ parents (Kathy Bates plays his mother) alone makes “Road” worth watching. It’s masterful dialogue that is rare these days. 

My grade: A-

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2 Comments

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2 responses to “Relationship movie

  1. RDC

    R—
    Nice to hear you’re struggling in a relationship . . . somehow there’s a commonness about this —in all its insanity of trying to fit two humans into the same space, so to say—-despite all the challenges that it invites. And demands.

    Love is . . . love. (Adjectives optional)

    And your new site is wonderful! I haven’t checked in for quite a while so it’s a pleasant change.
    “Very nice” in BoratSpeak.

    • robertdcrook

      I am happy that you like my blog on WordPress. WordPress has a lot more advantages than does Radio UserLand, including the facts that WordPress is free and allows me to blog from any computer.

      Yes, there are commonalities in relationships, straight or gay, and I have no problem watching a movie about a heterosexual relationship and being able to apply what I see to my own relationship and vice-versa.

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